I never liked the idea of love in the first place, marriage was out of question but even if it was for marrying I knew that i would never have a love marriage mine will have to arrange marriage for some reason I was ok with that. During my first year in graduate college my grandma talked about this guy to my parents as a suitor. I grew up in a very conservative society, where in cases of marriage the choice is up to the hands of the groom’s side the bride side just waits for the answer. However when my dad told me about it I agreed because till now I have not learnt to say no to my dad.
So before I met the guy I met his dad and frankly I really liked him he had a very welcoming face and then after a month when his so arrived from Canada I was in middle east and when I returned there was only a week left before he leaves again for Canada. However I did meet him my first impression about him was zero and something told me at that point he didn’t like me either so I thought this would never work out but after a two days I get a call from his dad that his son wants to talk to me and then the next night he calls me. We talked for pretty long time I learnt that his parents are divorced and that he doesn’t talk to girls much and that he was amazed by my height on the first day he met me. We continued talking on the phone for three more days and I fell for him I know it was really fast and easy but it did I realised i had no control over my heart and just fell for it .
I kept waiting for his calls, every time my phone rang I would get excited, I experienced a feeling that I have never felt before and I knew that what I felt where real and from the ways he talked I figured he felt the same. The day before he left for Canada he visited me. That very day he talked to my grandma and told her that he liked me and has considered marrying me and would marry me after 8 months when I heard this I was really happy the happiest I have been in all my life but like everything happiness too comes with an expiry date.
I have never met his mom; she came to see me two days after he left for Canada. I knew from the moment I met her that the woman didn’t like me firstly because it was the father who chose me and since they were divorced she would never appreciate his choice and secondly unlike the father she was very high nosed and very picky in her selection. I knew my meeting with her didn’t go well so I told my parents and my grandma, my grandma confronted me that the guy has already considered making me his wife and that the father liked me too so it wouldn’t be a problem. The guy told me and even my grandma that he is really his job on Canada and barely has any time to talk other than Sundays and that once he reached there he would give me calls but he never did there was sign of him or his family the funny part was they said yes and vanished off…….but I was heartbroken I cried every night.
I could never share my pain with anyone hence I am writing……and I don’t know what hurts more his indirect rejection or me never getting him..I still wait for him call every Sunday I have this hope in me that he is going to give me a call but he never does I keep wondering what did I say to make him feel this way keep asking myself where was I wrong,,,,I keep recalling the conversation we had keep wondering what he might be doing back there and hoping he would call me on a Sunday …..why did this happen to me for I have done nothing wrong….and I don’t have the capacity to move on…………